On average, I make the 600 mile drive from where we live in Ohio down to my hometown in Tennessee once a year.
On a good day, where you hit no traffic on the way down, it might take 9-9.5 hrs. On a bad day, you can add another 1-2 hours depending on stops and traffic jams.
It’s never an “easy” drive but it’s always worth it to be with family.
My grandmother (and my uncle) on my mom’s side of the family both still live there and my father is buried about 45 minutes outside of the area.
My grandmother recently turned 92 and I wasn’t able to make it down to see her for her special day but I was able to get down there this past weekend.
As I was heading out of town on Sunday to make the trek back up north, “Gram” and I were having some breakfast and coffee and chatting a bit.
She said something that has stuck with me since then, with the inspiration behind the sentiment coming on the heels of her acknowledgement of her age:
Life isn’t easy but it’s not supposed to be…you just find a way through.
I’ve mentioned this before on this site but her words of wisdom reminded me of it again.
Most of the things we value in life are the things it takes the most effort to acquire or achieve.
Parenting isn’t easy but you find value in the things you get right and wrong while raising your children.
Marriage isn’t easy but you make mistakes, you overcome challenges, and you look back with respect for what you’ve built (or rebuilt) with each other.
Taking care of your health isn’t easy but you’ve only got one body to get it right with. Some people start taking care of their body early on, some start later in life. Rarely ever will you hear someone say that it wasn’t worth it.
When Gram said life isn’t easy, she was talking about her own health, how things have changed as she’s aged and what she’s experienced in over nine decades in this world.
I heard a sentiment sometime back and I have to paraphrase it now but it was a list of things that are considered “hard”.
Getting healthy is hard, being sick is harder. Choose your hard. Etc. Etc.
And that seems overly simplistic to me.
I think that what is difficult for one, might be easy (or easier) for another.
I think some people tolerate and manage stress very well, some not so much.
I think some people are very good at time management and some people let their schedules run all over them.
And it still doesn’t change the fact that we’re all going to be faced with obstacles repeatedly which will make our lives more difficult, harder to manage, and more emotionally draining than we anticipated.
At best, we find the people and the tools to help us navigate those times.
If we’re lucky, we have enough self-awareness to be able to look in the mirror and ask: How am I contributing to this mess I’m currently in?
So, this week, it’s a little love note from my Gram to me to you, especially those of you currently struggling through hardships of any magnitude:
Life isn’t easy but it’s not supposed to be…you just find a way through.
And that path normally leads somewhere closer to where you want to be.
